“Before I got support, I nearly gave up playing”: Dan’s Story
Dan is a talented musician who has fought back against tinnitus - with the help of other people who understand what it's like.
We asked one of our support group members, Dan Franks, about his experience with tinnitus.
He shares his discovery of tinnitus, how it has affected his relationship to playing music and the support he received from Tinnitus UK in connecting him to a fellow musician. He also shares some reassuring few tips.
When did tinnitus first become part of your life, and how did it affect you at the time?
It was a couple of days before my birthday 2024 and just before Christmas. I had a heavy cold (looking back it was possibly Covid) and following that I developed an ear infection in my left ear.
There was a buzzing, hissing noise that at times was louder than the traffic on the motorway. At the time I didn’t cope with it particularly well. I went into a kind of panic mode. I basically threw everything at it to try and fix the problem. I had a microsuction on my ears to clear any wax and the doctors prescribed various steroids. I even went as far as trying to adjust the bite of my jaw, as I had read that this can help. I was basically frantically looking for any solution and fix to the problem.
Looking back on that time now I think I probably had a kind of mini break down. I was struggling to work and found concentrating on anything else almost impossible. I couldn’t sleep either and it was affecting my family life too. My partner didn’t know how to help or understand the problem and I felt like I was very much on my own.
What was the hardest moment for you before you found support?
I ended up going to see an ENT (Ear, Nose, Throat), and I think in my head I was clinging to the hope that he would say something along the lines of “this particular treatment will help”. However, he was very clinical and said in no uncertain terms that I had noise induced hearing loss and the tinnitus was permanent. I just couldn’t cope with the thought that I had to live with this, that it would still be here in years to come. The future and a future playing music looked very dark.
Has tinnitus changed the way you listen, create, or perform?
Before I sought support, I was considering giving up playing. I couldn’t play without hearing the noise in my head, it was distracting, dissonant and also stopped the enjoyment of doing it, as it was a constant reminder of how things had changed.
I had regularly worn custom ear protection, but I have invested (mainly for peace of mind) in some high attenuated plugs.
What support have you found useful from Tinnitus UK?
Tinnitus UK put me in touch with a musician called Lars. Lars had gone through a very similar experience to me and we spoke over the phone regularly. Lars was genuinely a life saver. Over the following 6 months or so, he helped me understand what was happening to me, he helped to understand the role that stress plays on tinnitus, how to manage the symptoms and most importantly that tinnitus didn’t have to define me.
How does tinnitus intersect with your creativity and music?
Lars has helped me realise that there are always times of calm in the storm. It is these moments that reassure me not to panic and I have learnt to give my focus to other things like playing music. It is during those periods of intense concentration that I find relief from the tinnitus. Lars has helped me to train my brain to focus on other things, to not give it the importance it once had.
How does music fit into your life alongside tinnitus?
I do take more precautions than I used to and there are times when I have to insist that things change because volume levels are too high. My custom plugs have become a permanent addition to my daily apparel, a bit like my keys or my phone. I have learnt that music making does not have to stop and in fact can be a source of relief and calm.
Why do support groups matter for people who might otherwise feel isolated?
When this happened, it was an intensely solitary experience. As it is all going on inside your own head. It is unlike many other ailments; there are no visible bruises for example. I found that even though family members really wanted to help, they didn’t really know how. It was in desperation one morning where I was sat in my car that I went on to the Tinnitus UK chat. Following this, they put me in touch with Lars. It was his experience, his understanding and his positivity that has been invaluable to me.
What would be lost if these groups did not exist?
Having that shared experience is so important for helping people. Having an easily accessible and positive knowledge base. But most importantly I think that when people are accessing these groups (like I did) it is probably at their most desperate and isolated moments. Without them, there would be the loss of hope.
What would you want someone newly diagnosed with tinnitus to know – that you did not know?
- It was when I gave up frantically searching for a solution that things changed for the better.
- There are people out there who have experienced what you are going through. Reach out to them, they can help!
- Time will change things. There are more important things in your life than Tinnitus, it isn’t all that you are. Life will be ok again.